On a very minor side note, they’ve ruined red baseball caps. I looked good in my red baseball cap; now it just sits there, wondering what it’s done wrong and why we never hang out anymore.

“It smells like a victory.” is second only to “Catch the taste” in the lore of Blue Jays related advertising slogans.

Shoutout to the true Ace of the toothpaste era, Gustavo Chacin. You don’t get your own fragrance for nothing you know.

As a Phillies fan, I very selfishly want him to go in as a Phil, but of course he is a Blue Jay in the Hall. October 6, 2010 is one of my favorite sports moments. Thanks for the memories, Doc.  

I’d really like to weigh in here Lauren but unfortunately Blue Jays fans have signed legally binding agreements that the team’s uniforms between 1996 and 2012 didn’t happen.

It’s all relative. I like him more than Cody Garbagetats. I like him less than ingrown toenails.

It did seem like MacDonald didn’t give Dillashaw all that much time to recover

Dana White’s UFC Debut on ESPN went poorly because he’s horrible at fight promotion, and it couldn’t make me happier.

Someone should just level with Tatum, “Stop trying to make Gambit happen. It’s not going to happen.”

The slipping sound is perfect! Unlike those Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercials, I won’t have to mute this video to masturbate to it.

The MAGA crowd is so conflicted: it’s a museum so it’s soft liberal cuckery, but there are kids in cages in that one picture

Just an all time great photo. Truly part of the Internet Canan

The, “OK. Thanks.” killed me. It was awesome because he was spitting straight fire in the booth, and he knew it. 

Trump is openly racist and so are his policies and actions. So if you support him, that’s racist.

Has anyone ever admitted to having a racist bone in their bodies? Which bone is most likely to be infected with racism? Femur? Rib? Have medical professionals ever confirmed the existence of a racist bone? Is it possible to not have any racist bones, but maybe a prejudiced tendon? An ignorant muscle?

If you’re a dangerous hitman and someone breaks into your house and kills your puppy, you kind of just have to go out there and take out every single last person responsible, with extreme prejudice.

John didn’t have to go on a murder spree over a dog

I could watch Keanu Reeves throw assault rifles at people like hatchets all day.

I'd see it just to listen to Sam Elliott speak.