I was really excited about the AI conference, but my licencse for 7.0 no longer gets me in the door.

That IS a nice story.

One of these things is not like the others, One of these things just doesn't belong, Can you tell which thing is not like the others. By the time I finish my song?

I don't think anyone who is anti-war atrocity can be a big fan of any U.S. President.

Keep fighting the good fight!

It was the slogan for Print Shop Deluxe

Well now you're putting the word "only" in there and making it more challenging!

Make your own art, and don't be terrible!

"People seem WAY more concerned about this football player who sat during a song, so I figure I'm not likely to be a headline anymore."

Screw dulicmers, man.

Right?

Dang, this gluten is really shootin' at the walls of heartburn.

I feel the beat call your name

"Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother? Sounds like a reboot I could do! Also, sounds like someone gets to go hat shopping!"

All cursing America as he ejaculated right into poor Mary Anne.

Larry the Cable Guy and Scott Baio draw near!

@Xanderpuss needs to make a joke about touching Ivanka for the voodoo to work.

The people that are willing to stop when the old lady in the mall asks if you'd like to take a survey.

Funny Farm II: Funnier Farm

It's Vaccination Week at the AV Club!