I’m not racist, I just think Jurassic World was a bad mov-wait that doesn’t make any sense hold on

Yeah, Darksaber was hilarious.

We are so fucked.

This guy’s about as eloquent as Scrabble tiles in a clothes dryer.

It’s a lowercase T, guys. For...capi...talism.

We’re screwed.

Open one end of the country, go around to the other side and shout and bang on it so they’ll get scared and run out.

It’s the worst meat.

If I wrote a romance novel based on my last dream it would involve giant talking beetles, a frog man, accidentally stepping in a plate of potato chips, and the woman completely disappearing from the story for no apparent reason halfway through.

I’ve seen worse handwriting from adults.

I fucking hate it when I have to make something for somebody allergic to onions, because there is no way to keep those little fuckers out of the pickles.

I hadn’t ever asked anybody out irl; usually I wait very patiently — for months if necessary — for them to ask me out.

I always feel that way when I join a new community (it doesn’t really help that my social anxiety can get so bad that even the anonymity of the internet doesn’t always make things easier), but then I guess I was just like, “fuck it” and started posting.

Like it sucks he went through something bad, but he sounds like a fucking dick.

I think this might be the first time I’ve actually seen tarsiers move and it’s...weird.

I hate the smell of pork. It reminds me too much of when my dad worked at a hog farm and made me come along, and the smells and textures encountered therein.

I’m not sure if my worst week ever was when my dad died, or eight months before that when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer with a year to live at most on Christmas Eve and I had to keep it a secret from the rest of our family so as not to ruin their holiday.

Yeah I’ve basically just worked fast food and not much else and I haven’t got any degrees, so I’m not sure how many options I’d have.

I have a friend in that area trying to get me to move out there. I really want to but I’m afraid of the economy tanking and not being able to find a job.