When I was eleven or twelve (I’m not sure, the memory is blurry) my Dad, driving his Beetle, made a left turn across the path of a speeding taxicab, after which I spent a whole week in a luxurious private suite atop the St. Joseph’s hospital in Tampa, after waking up in a dark back room in the hospital and, wondering…

What ever else you do, don’t treat her like they treated the Central Park Five.

I can’t “come at you,” Internet ghost, because you don’t actually exist in the real, material world. By which I mean, your balls are whole orders of magnitude too tiny to ever spout your fascist shit, face to anybody’s face, deliberately in order to outrage and anger them. Of course, people won’t really shoot you in…

And it should have been fired out of a gun pressed against the back of your neck.

I think with a reliable second car and access to adequate non-car transportation the first guy should go for the classic.

Remember last November when Trump was whisked off to Walter Reed hospital in the middle of the afternoon, and how, to this day, neither he nor the White House staff has ever bothered to tell the public why? Doctors don’t do cognitive tests just at random to random patients. Doctors administer those tests to people who…

New cars go years on end without a breakdown or unexpected time-consuming repair. That’s my experience anyway, which may be biased by the fact that I’ve only bought two new cars, and they were both Toyota Corollas. But anyway, that’s worth something: you shouldn’t consider buying a new car, unless your time is worth…

I bet he can’t drive a car.

It’s not such a great name, but it’s not as jarring as a name as “Mustang Mach-E.” After all the name “Corolla” has always been associated with economical practicality and reliability, and there’s not inherently that much of a clash between that tradition and a CUV-type car. Plus “Corolla” isn’t just the name of a…

How can you claim “Cancel Culture” is a fake and a sham and a load of crap? Why, I myself got “cancelled” before I ever got a teevee show and an editorial post at the NYT and any multi-million dollar book deal at all! And I’m not alone. Look around! All around you are people who have been denied the book deal and the…

But Florida has flattened the curve! It’s now a straight line pointing upward, almost perfectly vertical.

And the owner is probably the one who suffers the most from the lockdowns.

Seriously, does that look appetizing to you?

Wow, look at that, they even made an LHD export model!

Nixon was intelligent and competent, but nuts, mean and corrupt. Reagan, even pre-Alzheimer’s, was far less intelligent and less competent, and arguably just as mean and corrupt. GWB proudly claimed that he hadn’t read a single book since he “graduated” from “college,” so he managed not only to completely fuck up our…

Oh sorry, it’s just my inner seventh-grader saw where you misspelled “public” as “pubic” and I couldn’t hold him in.

I like it, but if you’re running a business that has pubic traffic, you’re gonna need more than face masks to protect yourself from the transmission of disease.

Is there any way to turn the truck pictures off?

denigrating this luxury Avenue

“It’s called terrorism,” he added. “What’s the definition of terrorism? To use violence and intimidation to frighten the public.”