Keith Olberman walks into an elevator. OUCH!

This could not possibly be more wrong. Don't ever say this dumb shit again in your life.

1. If jet fuel doesn't burn hot enough to melt steel, then how di-

The bottom line is the NFL no longer needs the government's help to remain viable.

See what I mean? Commenting going to shit. No mention at all of how far can I punt a football. F minus.

That mouthful of rocks was handled very well.

Well someone had to take Heath Ledger's place in the sequel.

Awww yeah, baby.

"Ere I waited seemingly a fortnight for myne Stuffed Crust Pizza to come 'hither. Myne server was verily NOT of good stock. Thy should be wary, forsooth! Yon, we shan't return."

Though only one could be named starter, both Cassel and Bridgewater are pro-moat.

That's weird. I though turf wars were typically associated with Oakland.

because multiple Broncos fans apparently think there's a causal relationship between jersey color and Super Bowl scores

It's not even a joke, either. Pretty sure it was the Steelers game where DHB got his face smashed that was on the same day as the Folsom St. Fair. I took BART back to SF and got on MUNI, and as people filtered in and out of the N pretty much the only thing that changed was the amount of crotchless pants. It was…

Bear movements, ranked:

More broadly, yes, there are conceptual issues with having the doors flung open. And we haven't even gotten to the real tests of fortitude—wait until someone dumps personal information about a writer and threatens them physically, with no way to track them, or some other horrifying thing we haven't considered yet. But…

That gif makes it look like he pissed off the Flash.

Says the guy named crayoneater.

This is a good fruit opinion.