I’m distracted by all that recycling that should be taken out. But glad to know she’s as human as the rest of us.

It is my hope that I will have a similar attitude towards my marriages.

ABC would have to hire an extra makeup person to blot that fivehead.

...including the Ferrari Tyga gave her for her 18th birthday.

PLEASE CONSISTENTLY USE LOTR COMPARISONS IN RHONJ POSTS TYIA

...until you have foot or knee pain and need arch support. Then you will be cursing Toms and Havianas. Signed, Former Toms Fan (until my arches revolted)

Dear Bobby Finger,

I think I’m on twenty years of wearing Birks now. When you go to resole them (and you will have to at some point), ask for Vibram soles instead of the usual. They last twice as long for those who wear them daily.

Counter-counterpoint: Your feet are jealous of my feet but are too embarrassed to say anything to you.

“not the ugly clog kind thank you very much, they make stylish crocs too”

Related: If at all possible, you’re going to want to pay cash. A little secret—if you find the right diamond guy (more on that later), cash means no tax. Taxes are for shmucks. Are you a shmuck?

you can get man style bands with diamonds. dont get a big one, just get a lot of them.

Counter-Counter-Counter-Point: It literally has nothing to do with your ability to stand against the man and everything to do with her willingness to stand against the man. Unless she is cool with not getting a ring, she is getting a ring if you want to marry her.

when you buy a diamond I suggest (as suggested to me by the guy who me the diamond I bought) getting the best cut and color you can for your money since this is what most people will see and then compromise on clarity by trying to find a a diamond with flaws hidden by the facets. Also once diamonds hit a full carat…

You would get a really crappy 3 karat diamond for $4k. If you want a legit 3 karat diamond, you’re going to pay 30k+.

You don’t know anything about rings do you?

Ima just put this out there: fuck those guys that got their grandmother’s ring, or any other dead relative’s ring. They cheated the system.

Where are you finding 3 karat rings for $4k? Are they gray from being so cloudy?

You’re going to (hopefully) spend the rest of your life with this person. Have a conversation with them like a goddamn adult and get her exactly what she wants with an agreed upon budget.