I voluntarily got a vasectomy after my second kid. My ex had two kids naturally and got pregnant seemingly if left my underwear near her. She was terrible at taking her birth control pills.

I was trying to think of a “if the parents had a boy it’s name would be...” but it’s hard to come up with a decent portmanteau.

Hmmm. I would’ve changed the name from Trashelle to Trishelle the moment I was legally able.

Caitlin, is her name really Trashelle or did you make that up? Because Trashelle sounds like the name of a Garbage Pail Kid. 

Even though that law applies to licensed abortion providers, not people self-managing their own terminations, Jessica Burgess was still charged.

I am pro-choice and deeply mourning the loss of reproductive rights in this country. [Bracing]. And I also think this case feels complex as at over 7 months we are talking less about a clump of cells and more about a living being who could technically be born at that time and, with assistance, survive. If this occured…

He does have a serious case of “anus mouth”.

Lede photo approved for featuring Drumpf’s disgusting PBM (persistent butthole mouth). I didn’t want to eat breakfast anyway...

It wouldn’t take a ton of effort for me to be a full-time vegetarian, though I would miss a few things (come on, you can’t tell me vegan bacon is anything like real bacon). But as it is, we mostly eat chicken at home, with the occasional bacon, pepperoni, or pork sausage. My husband eats beef maaaybe 2-3x a year, I…

Panera tastes like hospital food and has for years now.  That said, how do you run a bagel place without chive cream cheese?!

You just know that he spent hours looking into a mirror, trying out varying options for his mug shot.

totally. And you know he thinks he looks like a badass.

“No.”

Something I guess most people don’t hear growing up and future generations will never understand.

a big part of it is balance, Uncrustables are fine every now an then but there is a reason the kids crave it and it has a lot to do with the extra sugars in the bread and other ingredients.

Just bring the back the 7-layer burrito already.

And the best part is, he recognized them almost immediately.

Donald Trump has never changed a diaper.

I’m so glad we were finally able to move out of that dick-shaped state... My wife was a teacher down south, but I couldn’t imagine how difficult it would have been to continue that profession with such Puritanical imbeciles running the show. My heart goes out to all those children down south who deserves MUCH better…

We absolutely are. 

If they think Bill the Bard was bad, wait until they actually read the bible.