These owners really need to stick to sports.

If we HAVE to stand for a specific song, and HAVE to put our hands on our hearts or risk getting jacked are we really free?

Food and soda in a gym. Do you want Morants? Because that's how you get Morants.

Not to be all “get off my lawn,” but this is entirely his fault - he should have called “behind you” to his fellow kitchen worker, instead he created a situation where he had to bail out a teammate as a result of his own malfeasance. All I see here is a showboating glory boy. 

“Could you not drive in that scenario?”

“Today the US Attorney brings charges against Michael Avana.... Avanti... Avennnot gonna practice law anymore, anyway.”

Wait, I think I figured out why that pattern looks familiar. One little tweak...

Bosa’s mom is publicly wishing that her son had “pulled an Eli Manning”

Tre Mason: Man, fuck you guys. Not only am I not holding out, I was actually the first person to show up in St. Louis for training camp this year.

Oh neat, it looks like Neapolitan ice cream.

Listen, we can all enjoy Dicky jacking as many dongs as he wants, but deep down we know that shaft wouldn’t be worth a sack of balls against the Big Unit.

That bull is getting laid tonight. Never will have to buy a drink at the bar ever again.

The Knicks definitely traded Robin Lopez away to sign Dwight Howard. Next year their starting lineup is going to be Derrick Rose, Aaron Afflalo, Carmelo Anthony, Kristaps Porzingis, and Dwight Howard, and they’re gonna win 39 games and lose to the Hawks in the first round of the playoffs.

I’d love to watch LeBron try sepak takraw.

LeBron is way the best basketball player in the world, and has been for every moment of his NBA career.

I would respond like so:

The guy hit by the mouthguard didn’t know how to react. How does someone react in that situation, anyway?

“NOW GO HOME AND GET YOUR FUCKING SHINEBOX”

Maybe he was under extreme Burress.