Mr. Paez-Pumar, your silence vis-à-vis David Silva’s hair growth is deafening.

Livin’ on Gruyere is pretty freaking inspired!

Pour Some Chevre on Me
Don’t You (Forget Haloumi)
Bleu Monday
She Blinded Me with Abondance - Thomas Colby
Paneer I Go Again

Monterey Jack and Dianne.

I don’t think anything’s going to beat “Total Eclipse of Havarti,” but here’s my best effort:

Edam and Deliver

So to get that spare tire cover off, you just stick a quarter in that slot and twist it?

This was a good read, thanks. People are complicated. 

A date which will live in infamy. 

Hopefully this progresses to the point of awkwardly falling in love and getting married, so I can finally eat the chicken strip burrito I so richly deserve. 

Kate, I think you need to take the suggestions in comments to heart and start a whole new sub-site for Takeout called, “Punny Girl,” by Kate Bernot and do nothing but stories about places around the country in sign-beefs with each other.  Be our foodie soothsayer and the ace of the food base and see the signs.

Can confirm. Moved here from Florida, didn't understand all the cracked windshields until mine took a rock on I40 and I found out NM is not one of the states that mandates no-dedutible windshield replacement from insurance companies. 

There is no blood in this story....

We went to a frozen custard stand after our wedding - their policy is, you show up dressed in formals for a wedding, you get a free concrete! :) (our wedding photographer tipped us off to this one, and I was like “hell yes”, especially for a July wedding)

Nancy Pelosi invited Donald Trump, so I think she loses.

I only go to Taco Bell in white tie and tails. Not a heathen.

Your account’s been hacked.

I was super excited about this event, but I also have trust issues. So I scoured the internet to find out about Rock Star Beer festivals. Over all it seems most people are not happy w/ their events. The on going themes seem to be over-crowded, understaffed, and disorganized.

harry potter themed butter beer is just an excuse to move your poorly brewed diacetyl tainted swill to consumers who dont know better

I honestly still haven’t gotten over how many words he wrote about Gerard Deulofeu, the world’s most average winger.