As a Native woman, I'm not personally offended by these just as they are. They're pretty awesome looking, but my singular opinion doesn't represent my people or other Native peoples as a whole.

Your brilliant animal eats their own shit, and spends most of the time licking their own taint. My 3 year old, no matter how much meth she consumes, still knows her alphabet, her numbers to 100 and can still identify who has a sense of humor, and who is just an asshole.

I'm also an old, getting my thing on before all this super-landscaped designer vagina fad became popular. I've never seen a vagina I didn't like. In fact I love vaginas. When a woman shows me her ladybits it's like hearing fans at Anfield drunkenly try to sing I'll Never Walk Alone, or watching Enter the Dragon. I'm…

"I Got a Man"! Oooh yeah, it's time for the 7th grade dance!

Ladies tell me that when dudes Head South, and then have to get all washed up and fumigated and shit, what with all the girl-juice on their faces, that's a big turnoff and makes oral sex-getting doubleplus unfun. At least, the ladies I know say this. Dude's a loser, even if he picnics at the Y just often enough to…

This. I'm relatively an old so I've seen more than my share of them up close and personal and in all colors, sizes, etc. I can honestly say that any time a woman was willing to let me get that close to hers, it was the most beautiful one I'd ever seen.

Luckily, the worst that ever happened to me from hiding in a leaf pile was rolling in some dog shit.

Thank you! I never experienced or understood that either. I've been prone to anxiety about everything as long as I can remember. A rather shitty adolescence when all sorts of terrible stuff happened heightened that anxiety for me big time as a teenager. My line of thinking was:

Seriously. Let me out of here!

Nah, my pet peeve is when a child is just fussy on a plane — not full on screaming or anything, just vaguely and persistently and occasionally loudly unhappy — and the parents are so embarrassed by this that they make the situation 1000x worse.

Sorry to hear about that. It is amazing how you can do everything right, and those events happen.

Occasionally you will run into a parent that has checked out, that just no longer gives half a fuck about their child screaming at the top of its lungs for hours on end.

People have children. Sometimes those people need to travel long distances with their children — longer distances than can reasonably be traveled by any means other than airplane. They don't want their kids to cry any more than you do. But sometimes kids cry. It isn't bad parenting, it's just a fact of life. …

And everyone invariably replies with their snarky fucking remarks about how they don't have kids and shouldn't have to deal with it. Guess what you hipster/douche/fuckwad you're an inhabitant of this planet just like everyone else. It's my choice to have kids as much as its your choice to be a petulant fucking moron.

You should've added an honorary number 11: People who think they're parents because they have pets. Fuck those people.

This comment has everything going for it, including a bit of *suspense* in the first paragraph. It's all good and it's all gold!

Giiirrrlll I know, I woulve beat that queen down in the street,

It never fails. Right, it just has to be a gay guy because we're all just a bunch of mincing stereotypes who'll buy anything if it has enough camp value. For a feminist website you sure do traffic in a lot of stereotypes and...