I want to see him star on a show with Dylan McDermott and Dylan Walsh, about the problems of being actors that people constantly mistake for each other.

Yeah, that's related in part to the "He's a total prick, but he's good at what he does so we'll put up with the horrible things he says" trope, i.e. House, Big Bang Theory.

Related: a character wakes up in a hospital bed, and just minutes later has the strength to disconnect himself from all the wires and tubes, including the IV line (which is usually connected to a vein, and yet somehow he's not streaming blood everywhere), and just walks out of the hospital like nothing happened.

Yes. I know we're talking about TV shows, but one of the things I hate most about the Meet the Parents series is that everyone acts like DeNiro's behavior, particularly in the first one, is done out of love and care for his daughter. But he hides cameras in her bedroom and bathroom, which in real life, parent or not,…

The "hilariously" awful mother-in-law. It was played out 40 years ago, and speaking from real life experience, it's not terribly funny.

"You know, Detective Inspectorguy, we're just the same, you and I…"

I've had to miss the occasional school event because of work responsibilities. Children are surprisingly more understanding about these things than Hollywood gives them credit for.

I've always assumed that people getting dumped on their wedding day happens way less often in real life than on TV.

Really late to the party on this, but…

Wait, hold up: the president's kid, along with the children of other high-powered people, is just riding in a school bus without security, and evidently some other kid's civilian dad as a chaperone? That's a pretty big implausibility to have to move past right from the get-go.

Friends With Better Lives?

Gotta say, this sounds kinda not good.

Time really is a flat Smurfle.

THANKS, OBAMA

This long-ass winter has been bringing everybody down. I have a pile of art supplies and stories that need to be written, and I just can't be bothered with it when there's sleeping to be done.

I've been making an effort to eat more fruit and less refined sugar. It's a positive change, of course, but it's been making going to the bathroom a slightly more horrifying experience.

Most sincere condolences from me and Neko, the Official Sporks Household Pet.

Not so awesome. Found out my grandfather is going into a nursing home (though, not to get into long, boring, depressing family dynamics, he'll probably be better off), and that as of today my dearest friend since I was a teenager (a long fucking time ago) is checking herself into a psych hospital for treatment.…

Not exactly, more like "Here, we need to get this grotesque close-up shot of you sucking fried chicken grease off your fingers just right, can you do it ten more times?"

An acquaintance of a friend is going to be featured on an upcoming run of My 600 Pound Life. I'm sure you'll all be shocked to know how much of the show is choreographed, even though it claims to be a "reality program."