The best gift would be something selfless, like spending all of one's time and resources trying to catch the Pappy thief.

I think this move closed the book on Granderson. There's no room for him (and, another $10m+ contract) with Gardner, Ellsbury, and Soriano (and Ichiro/Wells, though I would guess both are due for a DFA if the 40-man gets crowded).

Pretty sure that I knew girls didn't have Dickies by the time I was in Kindergarten...

Fair enough.

Do assist... what was it exactly that the victim did to deserve to be killed? Was it the crashing of her car, knocking (or banging, or kicking, who the hell cares) on a door, or being in a 'drunken haze' (I guess you'd call this the Rob Ford trifecta)?

Don't forget your car breaking down/asking for assistance!

I never thought I'd see a better game than the '05 National Championship, but that might have done it. Even for someone that really doesn't like college football, THAT was as good of an ending as I've seen in ANY contest.

The omission of the Nuggets mascot from the D.H.o.F. procedures is the most egregious of all.

...but... onions, butter, cream? It's a juicy, well-textured salt and fat vehicle.

As for pearl onions, I can only assume they were in the prologue to this list in which it was explained that their superiority would be too humbling to the other Thanksgiving foodstuffs.

Really narrows it down, eh?

I think that it is fine to leave the ballot up to the people/readers, but after one condition is met: Greg Maddux is on the ballot. I think the writers/editors can take some executive privilege in this case before leaving it to the people.

Better ingredient (than the frog), best nominee this year (to the HOF), Papa John.

...seems like someone has a little skin in the game.

Nah. Wasn't particularly interesting, or noteworthy, or Deadspin (whatever that means).

.

That's some Madden 2002 for N64 level moves right there.

This is a total non-storfwiaeonbdoblkafeth34n2381#@!#@%

Use some of that pull ya' got over there for the Nuggets mascot. That was incredible.

YEAH JEETS YEAH JEETS