Too fucking cute, goddam.

"Show me a carrot not grown organically" <—my fave chem prof.

"Oh your first novel is totally publishable!" <—so, so many times.

No fair guessing! The answer is always penis.

Men holding hands—even exchanging kisses in public, as on the Continent—was common among the British up to Oscar Wilde's sodomy trial, at which point all male-male contact became suspect.

A V-Day wedding is a shitty way to upstage Valentine's Day for all your guests.

And then, very suddenly, a forgotten bobby pin from her elaborate Grammys milkmaid crown became lodged inside her skull,

"Fresh!"

For me, death is a necessary condition. People can't die without living; people can't live without dying. It sucks, because I'd like to see the next century; but it's also awesome, because I'd be seriously cheesed off if I lived for several centuries.

They would have beautiful children.

Paid for by Beyoncé for President for Life.

Each new translation could conceivably be called a first edition. There's a first edition Beowulf, for example, from 1999.

God forbid a party with a woman majority have women leaders.

I just need Oprah to be black cinema's bank-rolling, talent-finding, buzz-generating bamf. Plzthx.

I'm also watching because Mike and Harvey will be sexing at some point, I swear to god.

She's just gonna read the recap tomorrow like the rest of us.

Gotta launder that money somehow. May as well have a cool hang-out spot for your bros while you're at it.

Maybe the take away isn't "don't use the internet" so much as "don't enter into marriage with unreasonable expectations of perfection".

Man, and I never even sent a letter this year! THANKS M.OBAMA.

Sorry, but... Giving aid based on certain conditions isn't ideological colonization. It's the aid-giver exploiting a power (monetary) imbalance, but no country has a right to monetary aid from another. And the rights of the majority in a country shouldn't outweigh the rights of the minority; if I have to deny people…