The two teams have played each other 281 times now, we’re probably past the “familiarity breeds contempt” rivalary phase and now into the “is this all there is in this miserable rectangular state” existential dread phase

No man you just don’t get it. The pyramid is turned upside down. Reverse Funnel.

No way — he’d drop the phone.

It’s almost like passing the ball is an important part of the game.

It would take a combination of DFW’s spooky obsession with understanding the math and the minutiae of a situation, plus his ability to draw from his previous life as a super-talented jockbrodouchebag tennis brat AND Heller’s pitch black cynicism to adequately explain the Lakers’ 2015-2016 season. Even then you…

Just take a shit and stop worrying about it. I can guarantee your boyfriend isn’t holding his poops in on long weekends together.

They hate him less than they love power and proximity to power.

Forget about Cruz being batshit crazy. Nobody will vote for him because no one will be able to tolerate looking at his disturbing, chinless face for four years.

They did have SA-2s and MIG-17s, good point though. Despite winning almost every major battle the US lost Vietnam because of the failure to win “the hearts and minds” of the locals, not something thats going to be a major problem north of the arctic circle. Its also a lot easier to hide in a jungle than a frozen…

The Detroit Lions are the best film Lars Von Trier never made.

If you’re unsure of why so many Bernie fans are “rabid,” it’s because we’re tired of the media and other liberals who tell us he’s unelectable. So many of us are fervently trying to convince Hilary supporters who point to her “pragmatism” and “electability” that Sanders isn’t unelectable just because his ideas…

The problem is people who don’t want to vote for Sanders because of a few people on Twitter. Not of his politics nor policies, but of people on Twitter. It takes real privilege to not vote due to some mean people on Twitter.

Bernie Sanders has some annoying sexist fans.

Beneath Shaq’s endless layers of bluster and braggadocio, he remains at his core an awkward kid who genuinely cannot believe that he became one of the greatest basketball players of all time. Shaq really thought Jimmy Kimmel was pulling his leg.

That crinkling sound was him opening the crackers, which he then PUT DOWN ON THE FLOOR.

This motherfucker is so corny I swear Congress is gonna subsidize him in the next farm bill.

Since when do lips have personalities?

We’re still laughing.

In reality, what happened was Russo, in that very moment, realized that all of his efforts, his strivings, his bloody backstabbings to claw his way to the top? They were for nothing! It was all like life/the universe/fate/choose your omnipotent force/deity had set him up for the punchline of a lifetime, and that cold…