When in doubt, go imperial.

TIL when I eventually dry out, it will be because I moved to NYC.

“BevMo sells Sierra Nevada Pale Ale 6-packs for $10, 12-packs for $19"

I'm sure they were both on the flight line. Just ribbing you a tiny bit, it's a cool picture either way.

What exactly do you imagine the word rapacious means?

Psst, Cancer, you hit the wrong guy!

This needs an Alan Smithee byline.

That's the rare A-6 variant.

Jesus, man. We don't need an expansion team.

Are those wax statues?

Love the 50's dive masks.

Tim LaHaye approves.

Now I'm sad. I've had that trimmer for years now (yay for longevity) and I hate it. The vacuum doesn't do much, and it's impossible to get under my nose, so I have to use scissors to hand trim the Hitler-stache it leaves behind.

Now I'm sad. I've had that trimmer for years now (yay for longevity) and I hate it. The vacuum doesn't do much, and…

Slap on some simulated wood panels, and a magic doorgate, and I'm all for it.

Her Secret Service codename is "Clawhammer".

Walsh can take some small measure of solace in knowing that it was always going to happen that way. From the nanosecond, 13 billion years ago, when the universe sprang into existence from nothingness, and all matter assumed mass and speed and direction, this exact moment was ordained to be, as sure as the sun will…

*Waives Towel in your face like a dickhead*

The Saints are a treasure. I have to catch a game in their new park this year.

Do away with the fruit salad entirely. Let's start giving everybody merit badge sashes.

As a gentile married to a lovely Jewish lady, I'll say that latkes almost make up for the unspeakable horror of gefilte.