Bean the Baltese. 'Bout to be famous.

I was just watching a documentary on the chimpanzee. I enjoyed watching the part where mumma chimpanzee put the placenta in a waterproof bag and then blogged about it. AHH NATURE.

Travelling two by two into the Noah's arc of my mouth.

I'm not sure what you're talking about - I follow the paleo diet and as part of it I have created a Jurassic Park type island in which I grow only plant life and animals that I have cloned from ancient DNA samples.

Im on the third month of my Cambrian Diet. I really enjoy my morning of floating in the water, my legs and arms dangling around me, waiting for the light to get right so that food will come out.

I try to live my life by the mantra "SURPRISE! TACOS" - I just didn't know I had to share them.

For their part, the parents are like, "Um, I pay like threeve fafillion megabucks (PLUS 'charitable donations') for you to sit around while my dumb kid plays Oregon Trail

Haha! Me too! I'm constantly saying, 'EH! EHHH! Lights! The LIIIIIIGHTS!!!' or 'Tooooooo louuuuuuudddddddd!!!!' because I hate bright lights and all loud noises... they feel suffocating and pierce right into my brain. My boyfriend lovingly teases me about it, but has also learned the exact threshold for when noises…

"S8er Boi" - Avril's lesser-known ode to a certain half-man half-goat.

Simple Dog is my spirit animal!

Yeah, it's like not being an asshole.

Thanks. I had never thought about the simulating actual fighting, thus having contact in class aspect. But yes, it makes perfect sense.

Opium. The opiate of the discerning masses.

Um, all you have to do is touch the plane with your right hand and step on with your left foot. That prevents the plane from crashing. DUH.