she's a holy terror. There should be a pissing contest about hat your siblings do to the people you date.

Well, there was the time my little sister thought it would be funny to make me a dating profile over at farmersonly.com. I didnt know about it until I googled myself during a job search and found something about how much I enjoyed mud slinging and pig wrassling.

Get those pretzels and potato chips out of that cheesecake, YOU FOOL.

Funny how this works. They're vehemently against reaching kids how to protect themselves from the consequences of a very normal biological act, then they violently oppose abortion. When that teenage mother that results from these backwards ideas needs welfare and food stamps and Medicare they bitch about how people…

My mother always told me not to treat my uterus like a clown car...

This month, instead of a hut, I will create a fort made out of blankets and couch cushions in my living room, and it shall be glorious.

But. But. "Nineteen Minutes" is about a school shooting.

This is foul. I live down the street from this place and they're constantly out-doing themselves in the gross burger department.

Hey! Philadelphians are the only ones allowed to say that Philly smells like hot, humid pee.