I keep expecting one of these nights that she’ll accidentally drunken tweet: $35.95 - Delivery extra.

Ha! I said something like just a minute later. Great minds yada yada yada.

New theory: Yoko gets Chinese take out every night and just tweets us her fortune.

The blurb is so vague it makes me wonder if she’s written it yet. “An expert is some kind of secret thingie is on the run but she discovers a super secret secret (will fill in later) so she has to go back to work for her former handler (omg maybe a nemesis?) but then she falls for some guy who maybe knows more…

It sounds exactly like a first draft of a story where the author has no idea what any of the governmental or political infrastructure looks like and fills in every technical term as “spy stuff” and “the spy company” in the text.

With a 2-part movie adaptation for the fourth book.

I like how she’s trying to distance herself from her ‘Twilight’ series. Keep trying - that tripe will follow you forever.

I think that might be my aunt.

The Shrek movie perfectly sums up Donald Trump:

Uh-oh. Two warnings. I will heed your advice and maintain my blissful ignorance. Thank you.

Shrek is love, Shrek is life is an internet meme/video that you DO NOT want to look up. Take my word for it, I’ll never forgive the teen that brought it to my attention a few years ago :(

Don’t look it up. Do. Not. Look. It. Up.

You do not want to look that up.

somebody +1 told me

Smash Mouth gets very offended at that (they wrote this weird tweet about it a while ago... its somewhere on gawker but I’m lazy) seems they were famous before that, and yet all we remember them as is the Shrek band so really they still lose.

+1 wrathful tweet

I know this isn’t Shrek related but....I saw this image making rounds on Twitter and have been laughing for like an hour. No idea who created, wish I did.

Yeah, but I still can’t forgive Shrek for making Smash Mouth famous.

That is one shoddy V. It looks like they were trying to make a second heart.