Came for Trump bashing, staying for the motherfucking Rules of Acquisition getting name dropped in the comments.

Bill Gates would actually a pretty reasonable fucking president at this point, though.

I’m a Penguins fan and I would like a few thousand more words trashing the Pens for going to the White House.

I love this piece.

This was literally the most comically pointless offensive call of the season so far.

Can we do another Rivers lipreading thread based on that second gif?

Keebler elves don’t get to tell me who to bang.

Fed is going to coach the shit out of some guys a few years after retirement.

Defcon gets more serious the lower it gets. Defcon 1 is “fire ze missiles.”

Overall better? No.

#WhenIDippYouDippWeDipp

Rooting for Kvitova, because I must hate America, or something.

One of my favorite central PA memories was, sometime in the ballpark of 2004 or 2005, seeing Steve Blackman walk out of a movie I had also just been in, wearing Adidas track pants and a hoodie and definitely looking like he could have killed us all. This being not too far removed from his WWE days, it was kind of cool.

Counterpoint: Orville will probably be pretty decent for people who grew up on any iteration of Star Trek.

No, no, no. Fucking stop.

Okay good, I thought I was the only one who thought this guy has Trump-level sentence construction skills.

The Fyre festival reference was sublime.

Just when I think this man’s mind can’t get any mushier....

This just killed me.

He’s been so good for so long that he can and does question the established rules, compares them to what he knows he’s physically capable of doing, and then says to himself, “Well, why not hit a swinging volley backhand for a winner?”