Tie goes to the school who didn’t cover up child molestation for four decades.

From the forehead I’d say he’s at least half Klingon.

I don’t know about Santa Claus, but Saint Nicholas was clearly a Klingon.

Look he can’t hel...

I’m glad that the law has finally stopped looking the other way with this bullshit.

Kayleigh McEnany is an anagram for Evil Succubus.

Kellyanne reminds me of a worn-out, fucked up animatronic at a pizza restaurant where the one eye doesn’t open all the way.

“Who’s there?”

If it’s a true dad joke, then it’s “Hu’s there?”

That has got to be the most boring account of an“alien encounter” I’ve ever read. There’s no way there could be any rational explanation for that at all, nope.

In an attic somewhere there’s a portrait of him getting prettier.

“International Federation of Bodybuilding president Rafael Santonja”

Oh I have such a shame. I allowed a genetically altered bin of NOXplode to bite an Abercrombie & Fitch cable knit sweater and now we have this apple smashing creature to deal with. I am so sorry.

3) I am no fan of Mika, but her silence is literally deafening here.

I can feel the abyss staring back

I really hope it’s just a giant wooden coffee table.

Dog whistle years?

first they made facts subjective, then they made words salad, now this family is after our time?