“Later, he called and left me a message. ‘Can you believe this? Who would say this? I don’t want people to think this about you,’” she said. “He thought that I would try to go out with him...”

So, basically Donny ran for president because of an Obama vendetta from the State dinner jokes and because he’s, you know, black, and the racist Mexican wall-building bent was a vendetta because she wouldn’t screw him?

It’s not that hard to learn to pick the puck up or fling it, but actually throwing it on target is really tough, and having only one chance to do it and making it is pretty sick.

There’s always one.

Some of his best work has been done while off the ice.

Your grandfather probably gets it from the fact that Superman was played by George Reeves on TV.

Please leave dead baby jokes—often hilarious—out of this sordid conversation.

PULISIC IS JUST FINE AT BVB THANKYOU

LET ME DREAM OF PULISIC AND RASHFORD!

Because Jose has a long and storied history of giving kids a chance?

edit: we both know he’d thrive at Liverpool, as much as we’d hate to admit that.

The real question: is Pulisic’s dad as smooth a tax accountant as Messi’s dad

Barca better not rely on Google Translate for the transaction, or they’ll end up buying William Pulisic.

Pulisic needs to stay where he will play. It’s too soon for him to go to Barca.

What Billy won’t say: Pulisic is better than Messi.

On top of everything else, he’s never to my knowledge shown a trace of charm, or even simple grace, regardless of the setting.

Yeah, he actually started out pretty damn funny, telling the kind of jokes you’re supposed to tell at this kind of event. He was, dare I say, likable. The Melania joke was truly funny.

Just like at the debate, Donald started off appropriately enough and then absolutely cratered. In a room that should have been more friendly to Trump than most (a bunch of mostly monied conservative religious folks), he couldn’t but help but say something totally inappropriate and nasty about Hillary Clinton, and the…

I’m more offended by Rocky in Boxers than anything Trump said last night.

I never understood why people like the Bakkers got arrested for that crap when that’s the whole reason the 700 Club exists.

A lot of you are talking smack about these cultural superstitions without being part of the culture and understanding what these traditions mean. You guys are now cursed for insulting these ancient traditions, but fortunately for you I am in a forgiving mood and will break the curse on your bloodline for a small…