It’s a pet peeve when I hear a corp. say “Buy our shit and we’ll donate a dollar to Starving Babies O’ The World!” Fuck you MultiNational Locusts, INC.! How about you actually donate half a gazillion of your own money if you really want to do good. Hell, even advertise it and get a PR “Attaraptor!” for your angel…

“Scotch as a category is seen as particularly intimidating by women.”

All the scotch I’ve had tastes like campfires smell and I simply don’t find it appealing. They could put a horde of stumbling corgi puppies on the label and I still wouldn’t drink it. I’d keep that bottle though.

except what happens when i get so drunk off of jane walker that i end up using my boyfriend’s razor?!?!?!!?!?!?!??!

Which America? Cause you’re not even the greatest country in North America.

Looking at the list of list discounts, haven’t most NRA members been missing Chubb for years, which is why they are NRA members?

Conservatives really hate that invisible hand once its slaps them in the face.

Well that’s a big assumption, and a rude one, and I’ll be sure to tell my chickens I can’t eat their eggs anymore because it offends some random asshole on the internet. Good day.

And then they write thinkpieces about the “culture of victimhood” created by LIBRULS. Boo hoo, nobody likes my Confederate flag bikini with swastika-tattooed TruckNutz earrings! I’m so persecuted!

This is the most random nostalgia to converge in fantasy and I’m in love with it (and here for the sentiment!).

I know women like this. They are high school graduates from my religious and conservative hometown, white, who married a man with some kind of “masculine” job (military is a common one, followed by contractor/construction work). They are SAHMs. They sell MLM shit. They love guns and pose with them on Facebook. They…

But, you don’t eat meat, so you AREN’T hypocritical. All the people who gush over this story, but don’t think its strange to eat sacred cows or other mammals that are smarter and more sociable than dogs, are hypocrites. It’s pretty simple...dogs, horses, cats SO STRANGE...cows, pigs, deers PASS THE SALT!

In my daydreams, Obama walks in, says “How about a nice Hawaiian Punch?” and decks him!

Toothless White males?

Steve Bannon’s “rootless white males.”

Yeah all geniuses do not belong to Mensa. Stone reportable has a 150+ IQ, only other person I know with those numbers are my brother.

We’re gonna need a new ruling on the winning team in the Cool Girl Olympics. Team CPAC beats Team Wings.

Jesus christ on a popsicle stick.

It’s a good idea, and as we all know, good ideas are always abhorrent in the US.

It is hypocritical for us to arbitrarily care so much more for dogs in these horrible intensive farming situations, than we do for the pigs and cows and chickens, who feel just as much pain, in farms here at home. That being said, I cannot WAIT to see Game Changers - the movie.