Great point, Laura. How is it that Do you want there to be brown people in the country? was never on any ballot?

My son loves video games and goes through phases where he decides he wants to join the army and become a sniper.

He is also mortally terrified of ants and squirrels.

You buy a Big Mac, you get a coin (if they still have them) good for another Big Mac at no additional charge. To me, that’s a free Big Mac.

As someone in Information Security.

This is not what you do.

Meet Kevin!!

My cat’s name is Gary.

My cat’s called Patrick. Also known as You Stupid Cat

I love “people” names for pets. The more mundane the better, so Mark, Tina, etc. get my stamp of approval.

+1! I’m a new dad and I’ve never once forgot my kid in the back seat. If you’re that much of a fucktard and wrapped up way too much in your life then you shouldn’t have a child! Dumbfucks wont forget their phone but they’ll forget their child??!!

Exactly this.  There’s a sandwich gal here who rings up the sandwich and says, without fail, “That will be 11 million dollars.”  It’s a trivial thing to let bother me, but it’s so bad.

This.

it’s literally explained in the article 

It was explained why right after that sentence, fuckface.

Holy Saltines! Those crackers came out of the same box.

I can’t wait until this gets turned into a Dan Brown-esque conspiracy thriller.

They complete the heist and return to the hideout to split the loot. The shadowy lead figure that bankrolled the whole job is there. No one has seen him as of yet. Everyone collects their share and leaves. Seth “The Mouth” Rogen turns around before leaving:

Omg....pop up book

“Summer penis, had me a blast! Summer penis, happened so fast!”

Moved back.

Marvin the Martian not being at least in the top five is a crime against humanity, and I demand a swift and savage retribution against those responsible.