Male escorts. Paid by the taxpayer. I would bet my house.

There needs to be one message with regards to Lindsey, “What does Trump have on you?” Just over and over and over until he goes insane. 

My Dad says he doesn’t work hard enough on defense. And he says that lots of times, he doesn’t even run down court. And that he doesn’t really try... except during the playoffs.

This should just be posted at the bottom of every article about “sexy costumes”, regardless of the context. 

Every time I see an article somewhere about tone-deaf “sexy” Halloween costumes, I feel compelled to post this video

And Trump’s America.

Now I’m starting to understand why every article mentions “full shift”. They’re going to try to claim she was overworked, when it’s way more likely she was drunk or high, but since they’re giving her time to sober up and get her story straight we’ll never know for sure.

She deserves to go to jail for a long time. Which means she’ll get like... a s̶l̶a̶p̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶w̶r̶i̶s̶t̶.̶ free paid vacation.

There’s a lot more detail coming out in the comments in the Reddit thread about this (the person who posted the thread claims to know some inside info), but apparently her keys were still in the door after she shot him, and two neighbors say she was knocking on the door for some time demanding that he open it. So it…

Be prepared for: Officer not charged. Officer was assaulted. Victim had a record. Officer was justified. XXXX was found at the apartment. The shooting doesn’t count because the victim assailant was in his home minding his business Black. You know the drill.

This is the turning point for the environmental movement! It’s starting to affect the dicks so now it’s serious!

Also, who is Prince Charles Opens a New Window? Sounds like a new age synth duet.

Alexa, play The Sound of Silence

It cemented the Coven season as my favorite, and I am a diehard Stevie Nicks fan.

Frances Conroys character screaming out “Balenciaga!!” as she was burned at the stake remains one of my favorite moments from this bonkers series. 

I’m sure there are a lot of girls who are Playboy models SLASH random job titles. I was a playboy model slash drywall hanger. 

You say that, but right now, a young Zephyr Timblebum is booking her first modeling gig. And Glynda Wonklefuss is heading to Hollywood to follow her dreams.

If she just figuratively married him, she would end up saving a lot on legal fees in the breakup. 

Bleep Bloop Bleep Let’s Laugh With Celebrities With Mr. Good Time Smiley Pants