As am I, pal, as am I.

We need to get these Real American Heroes over to the boner-pill thinktank right away!

*golf clap*

Do you have a Ruby Tuesday's around you? Do they still exist? When I worked as a retail store fixer and traveled a lot, I could always count on their salad bar and the best potato salad ever.

A number of years ago I hosted the great Jean Beliveau for an autograph event. After we finished with the private stuff, I asked him where he wanted to go to lunch. I was expecting The Keg or somewhere fancy, but instead he said, "I would like to go to … Happlebee's."

*cries over loss of a pretty good Monte Cristo w/raspberry jam*

My wife said she'd like to study Jude Law. Am I gonna be rich?

Feed the tuna fish mayonnaise.

If he's talking to Kevin Spacey that should be rephrased as, "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WHY, MAN, WHY!?!"

That gives me an idea, though …

Similar to my experience with "Bigger, Longer & Uncut." Man, there were some parents just sprinting for the exits.

But it comes out here.

Sorry, I would have been here sooner, but I was teachin' the monkey to smoke, duh!

Nothing can kill the Grimace.

I … wow. Awful and brilliant.

"I don't like Pokemon because you're always the ones who find the
dead body. You never find a dead body when you're sitting at home eating
ice cream and watching porno, do ya? I was changing tapes and I saw a
foot! I dropped the lube and called the cops!"

No, but the lawyer knew he was going to call and 20 years later, he's still billing him for waiting.

What doesn't need more curry?

See above.

You know, I probably picked the wrong group to flip out about. Grammer has been great in his VO roles, and Perlman is Perlman. I retract my bitchiness in this instance.