Something something slapping little Jackie on the head

No?

Cream cheese, Krab, garlic powder, green onions, soy sauce and Worchesterishtistersister sauce?

Fried with a half-slice of processed cheese on white bread. I … I gotta go buy some Spam.

I don't, but I know what you're talking about. Have you ever made cold Krab rangoon dip? Awesome with Triscuits.

Makes a great cold crab rangoon dip with Triscuits, too.

Orange pekoe out the nose. Damn you.

LOL Michael Vick, as opposed to the myriad of NFL domestic abusers or worse you could have picked. Ray Carruth FTW in proving Easy's point.

DUDE, STOP BOGARTING THE PEANUT BUTTER

I'm tired of people saying they can do both but filling my timeline with stories about kittens thrown out windows or dogs being in artificial rapids with a fucking scuba diver. "I can do b OH MY GOD THIS DOG WAS INCONVENIENCED"

No, that's a Dem thang.

The fact this isn't getting more love is shih tzu.

YOU DON'T SAY?!?!?

OJ, is that you?

Mate, I know a dead project when I see one … and I'm looking at one right now.

The Allman Brothers' "Whipping Post" is almost 23 minutes live - plenty of time for a trip to the can, a jaunt outside for a smoke, hit the vending machines and then maybe, another trip to the can.

Well, of course he wouldn't do George Clooney's wife? I mean, that's … oh.

When do we get this kind of reverence for Klax?

Dennis, you are forgiven for not recognizing Amy Schumer as the mom, assuming the script didn't reference vaginas five times in 30 seconds.

Somewhere, Humpty Hump's ears just perked up.