You motherfucker.

And here I am struggling to change into a second shirt because I don’t want to do laundry sooner.

Blake, it’s time to get a stylist. I know you think you know what’s what, but I’m telling you, it’s time to hire a professional. I mean, we all have teeth but I’m not about to do my own dental work, ya dig?

“warmest condolences for the death of your son/daughter, military is hard almost as hard as writing this. Here’s a coupon for 5 dollars off on your next visit to the Trump Tower restaurant and a MAGA keychain”

Lol I live in another building with a view of that park. Thank God I’ve never seen anyone fucking. There’s a lot of needles and broken glass up there tho, plus people walking their dogs. Someone’s bound to get Hep C or roll around in dog shit.

That makes no sense. Why would the One-Eyed Snake be using binoculars?

Back in my day you had to pay extra to see that kind of thing, they should be happy.

Reminds me of yet another reason why she was the boss:

“What did you do to your makeup?”

Overall this was a solid episode for SNL, but this skit in particular was great. Kate is a national treasure.

I mean, if she leaked those things anonymously she could still collect from Donald...

Mike Pence probably won’t accidentally start a nuclear war with North Korea.

I assume Trump will just use his future mug shot?

Tyga is still trying to get that Kardashian fame, huh? I imagine he’d try and sue Kylie for child support to help pay all those unpaid bills he has.

The feelings toward certain people on the right today tend to get very specific as to how I’d like to see them get their comeuppance.

Looking for Comey’s curtain to hide behind.

God this is the best headline ever.