You could be a professor of linguistics at Miskatonic University for your ability to translate that.

Bush used to say dumb shit, but you knew what it meant, and it came off more as goofy than straight-up weird.

My ex had an abortion when she was a grad student. An undergraduate degree is basically useless in her field. If she had dropped out to have a kid, she would have lost her grant and scholarships.

My writing professor would have had a mild stroke at, “sort of doubt.”

That tiny knot on that wide-ass hilariously dated 80s Power Tie is cracking me up.

Absolutely.

I really, really want to know how the 25% of Americans who, “don’t approve of immigration,” ended up in this country.

Imagine the absolute meltdown from the press (and I don’t merely mean Fox News) if it came out that Barack Obama insisted he knew more about the Vietnam War than an entire room full of Vietnam veterans.

I was shocked at how expensive Western-Cooley is, with its godawful reputation.

Michael Cohen gradauated from literally the worst law school in America, Western-Cooley.

Trump reminds me of a pathological liar I used to work with.

I remember working in Klamath Falls, Oregon last summer. They had a Fred Meyer and a Wal-Mart.

I think a more apt comparison would be “Dirty Work,” which I believe is the only film in which Norm received top billing.

Same. We like Queen Oona. And how nobody treats it odd that the king’s second wife is some sort of sultry goth monster woman.

First season of Parks & Rec.

The Saints also had a Sen. Larry Craig “tapping foot in a bathroom stall” bobblehe...foot night after he was busted for public lewdness at Minneapolis International Airport.

2 in Portland, 1 in Charlottesville...

Go to any derpy right-wing blog. Breathless headlines of, PATRIOTIC REAL AMERICAN ABSOLUTELY DESTROYS LOONY LIB.

Your mom & pop place presumably has talented chefs who take pride in their job, and not sullen teenagers assembling pre-packaged components.