You opted to go with #moitoo when #moiaussi is a) the correct translation and b) the hashtag they use in France? Fight me.

if they’re the greatest team ever why aren’t they domestically dominant

“It boggles the mind how a single team, in an era of unrivaled competitiveness around Europe, has managed to maintain such an iron grip on the one trophy every club on the continent most covets.” Because they don’t try to win their own league? In a league of basically two teams, they’ve won it twice in 10 years.

GRANT-LAND’S OH-VER

I hope Carmelo Anthony drops 76 points on them in his home opener.

And we can refer to them as the Foot Clan

It sounds like TMNT, and that’s final. We’ve decided on this five years ago, and do the US Mutant Ninja Turtles song. I still don’t know why this isn’t our mascot.

Can someone just go ahead and Photoshop La La in over Maggie?

“Houston, we have a problem.” [coming your way]

Let’s not let accuracy or consistency get in the way of a killer closing line

“Whether it works or not, one thing is clear: Carmelo Anthony is willing to do anything to leave the Knicks.”

Gonna pass on some Deadspin chode’s epic takedown of one of the best GMs ever.

It’s Bill Haisley. As if.

Ronaldo does a thing > call him a diva > get clicks

Barry is great at covering the NHL (I still don’t get how people bitch about deadspin’s lack of hockey coverage.)

*searches Deadspin archives for story titled “Lionel Messi’s Hissy Fit Is Reportedly Almost Over”*

To be fair, Ronnie is just copying a playbook:

The real story here is that Kershaw recognized him