Every time Miley licks an object she needs someone to swat her away like a toddler

I HAD NO IDEA SHE WAS DATING BEN SCHWARTZ.

I asked my mom if when you have more than two at once you’re allowed to start giving them away like kittens

I’m definitely doing that.

I’m always surprised when I see you grey!! I liek ur posts

I GOT CHOO

When the election is over and a new president is inaugurated, he’ll hire movers to start moving into the White House

Not crazy, I think you nailed it. It’s like it’s a thing that has happened so often that we should have figured out how to fix it by now but we’re just doing the same thing over and over again that has never ever worked, beating our heads against the wall until we’re bloody and concussed.

I’m just so tired

“I was like, I can’t just ask somebody for a new pen while I’m doing this!”

hot

The admin was just like “oh god, no, no no no” when they imagined the shitstorm that would occur

That’s like the ULTIMATE host!! I so want to do that!

but srsly, isn’t crawling around like that murder on her knees?? Owww

Ken just couldn’t keep himself together (literally)

YES! more than one had literally no neck because the head had been jammed on so tightly