That was a thing going back to my time prior to highschool. Honestly hadn’t even thought about it in a long time.

I like it, sounds like my kind of woman.

Very nice. My tops (in no particular order) would be using my brand new 2006 Malibu to haul a trans and rear axle for a Tahoe, using a dump truck and some ramps to rescue a CRX that got stranded offroading (fit nicely in the back), using a 1987 LTD and chains to unflip a 1991 Cherokee, towing a Kia Sedona four miles…

Yeah, Patrick has been doing some yoga this evening.

Seriously, Deadspin has a long history of tasteless jokes, but it is the last place i would expect to see even a majority of people siding with the athlete.

Ah, yeah, I can hold my own in needlepoint, follow about any template, but my mother created absolute works of art. Also, I would love some sugar skull hand towels. Oddly enough, I have no examples of stitchcraft myself, my sister has the vast majority our mother’s, and all of my own goes to my kids and some to my…

I just wanted to say that you sound like an amazingly awesome person and that I am sad that the universe, in its infinite unfairness, never brought us together and allowed us to be friends. Do you needlepoint? My g-grandma, grandma, mom and sister all knit, but I never got the hang of it (I have a lack of dexterity in…

I turned 32 one week ago, I have three children and have inoperable stage III colorectal cancer and the treatment center I’ve been going to for two years now just opened up a palliative care section that they transferred me into for pain management. I had been on 30mg oxycodone/roxycodone (not OxyContin as slow…

Rape, drug conviction, larceny, shoplifting. Fun fact: Only two of those will get you blacklisted from working at Walmart for 7-10 years. Care to guess?

Also true.

I’d like to say you’re stretching to justify your opinion but my intial thoughts on why he would call his mom, rather than, say, somebody in Brazil was because he needed cash and just claimed he was robbed after paying someone off to cover up some stupid indiscretion. Sure, he’s worth a ton of money, but most of his…

I can’t wait for the day my Kinja handle is randomly used in a sentence so I can do what you just did. Must feel good, I’m jealous.

This wouldn’t even be a story if he were just some random John and not an Olympic athlete.

Haha, I was in the ER a few weeks ago and some paramedics brought in a woman who was having a particularly bad experience after taking ketamine at a bar. I had to check and make sure it wasn’t 1989 all of a sudden.

I am now a big fan of YOUR story.

Beautiful, this needs to come out of the grays.

Imagining hearing that re: my friends and family. Though I was born in the eighties.

I've always considered myself more of a fucker

Wats it meen

I’m sure he would have much preferred to go out with a bang instead of a snap.