This just proves what I have always said. Sharing feelings was the worst invention the universe ever created. The less we have to do it, the better we all feel.

Happy Thanksgiving to all! Most of all, I'm thankful that my planet hasn't been blown up in this timeline yet.

If we could just combine Badass Digest with Kickstarter, we could get an even more efficient system, in which baseless movie rumors are immediately funded and produced with one click!

Same here bro. Giant fonts for tired primate eyes.

Um, who took my AV Club and Pinterested it?
In other words, if I wanted a Tumblr, I would have asked for a seat in the gym.

The Less Sense A Revolution Makes, The Better! Now To Figure Out Why My Mobile Device Is Making Everything InitialCaps! everything I Say Sounds Like A Proclamation!

Maya's great… but…
Variety Shows, like Variety Meats,
are not only crap, but they are unashamedly crap.
They're like the entertainment and food versions, respectively, of the message "You bastards will eat anything, so we threw this shit together for you, and nobody cares. But, hey, if you're drunk or stoned, it smells…

What, man? It's modern times! Everyone knows everybody's address anyway, right? I assume I am being watched constantly by everyone, and I'm ready for mob violence. If it happens, I have a tricky shotgun trap and a rope thingy all set up in my foyer.

I recommend they spend the remainder of their lives learning kung-fu and caching their wealth in gold-coin form in increasingly hard-to-reach locations. It's what I recommend to all humans, actually. Can't help it, I've seen the future! Party!

Sleigh Bells music is great, in the way that Snickers is great. It's ear candy that will give you brain decay.

Toulouse, France is the 4th largest city in France, and it boasts the headquarters of Airbus!

I bet that guide really punched up the segregated dances.

Wow, you got this far on the Internet without finding out… you had a good run.

Fortunately, I never get tired of these.
I will put Pink Floyd's "The Wall" on this list happily, however. I guess we all have our own.

If it wasn't for the rap game, he would definitely (by his own admission) be knee deep in the crack game.

Navigating criminal underbellies is just part of a day's work for John Ramses: Sexy Egyptian Butcher.

What about the mediocre, non-controversial "All women have two X chromosomes and have ovaries" stereotypes? Pretty soft, if you ask me! Totally marginalizes the triple-X karyotypes and female-identifying sufferers of gonadal dysgenesis!

As a kid, I was always fascinated by the possible backstory of the 1976 Jet Threat II.

True, but are we ready to shut down Disqus, like our Republican heroes, in order to win our demands? Which are… um… not sure!  http://swampland.time.com/2…

Change, as you know, frightens me, for I am stodgy and superstitious.