Yeah, funny thing is one way i know this kind of thing ain't so edgy nowadays, is that this cake is very similar to one a pretty heteronormative friend of mine had recently at his 45th birthday party in suburban Atlanta.

He prefers to be called a "Queerly Gendered Hay Person," I'll have you know.

Yawn.. so not shocking, Franco. If it had been, say, a lime Jell-O mold with a bunch of cock rings embedded inside, on the other hand… what chaos might have ensued.

That's why they're calling the upcoming reunion show "Kidney Failure in Manhattan."

They say you ain't a real rock star until your jeans are so tight you can read the credit card number through the denim of your back pocket.

We thought we had solved all the problems when we built the giant robots… looking back, we should have known they would eventually get together, form a rock band, start playing loud metal music and party across continents, drinking from giant beer cans the size of corn silos… smacking their chests together in…

I am actually interested in seeing this, now that I know it exists. It sounds like a mashup of Blake Edwards and Barbarella.

Today's Tom Sawyer… Mean, mean pride

Aw. Everything changes, don't it. Well, may everyone, both the leavers and the stayers, continue to live long and prosper (as another famous Vulcan once allegedly said)

Why is Karl Urban in the list?

Let's look on the bright side, people! At least his actions have resulted in the death of a future dictator, leading eventually to the avoidance of a thermonuclear war in about 45 years! (For the record, that will only put the war off about 18 months, but sometimes the death of one outweighs blah blah blah…)

Many would argue with your implicit dumping of Wrath of Khan as "not poignant and stunning." 
Wait… I think I hear them arguing now. Yep… a steady tick of a million keyboards in a million computer nooks. If you close your eyes, it's almost like crickets on a Summer evening. Furious, sweaty crickets. Or maybe cicadas.

At least she didn't run out and join a Zumba or Belly Dancing class

No shit, he fucked a younger woman, not sure what "noble story" anyone expected. Just typical Homo sapiens behavior (yes, both genders). Humanity's not built for monogamy but it doesn't stop a lot of people from trying, and quite a few from succeeding despite the evolutionary excuses.

Obviously Eno is our era's go-to guy for easing people into pleasant submission. The coming totalitarian robot state would do well to recruit him quickly, if they haven't done it already. He could even provide the background music for toiling in the space ants' sugar mines.

This flower is wiltin'!

All I know is that this shit is much more entertaining than the Joaquin Phoenix shit from last year.

too old to be pissed, too young to blow off the promise of a cash cow.

Send in the lawyers, boys. Full riot gear, double chestplates, bling-vision goggles. And make sure they're appropriately camouflaged for the after-party!

I don' think he does that either. If you ask me (AND WHO DIDN'T ?echoes………) he walks the line between admiration/awe of art and science very well. Just like many actual creative people in the world realize that there is no barrier between "engineering" and "humanities" except the one that we keep putting up at…