Awww <3

Hey now, I’ll have you know I look exactly like a paper bag in all respects. Color, shape, personality. It’s why I’m so popular.

I, too, am Ron Funches playing a 35 year old white man.

Hi, I speak crazy white:

I read the restaurant’s name as “Satan” and I thought, “Oooh, that makes sense. No human would do this.” Then I reread the restaurant name and remembered hell is other people.

I think paper straws are a silent contender. Don’t rule out their chalky badness.

Everyone knows the plural of Smith is Smeeth and the plural of Jones is Jonesen. That makes the plural possessive Smeeth’s and Jonesenz, respectively.

I’m 29 and I have a minor cold. I think I’m already done. I can’t go on like this.

Speaking of old-timey sexism, my mom recently complained that a flight attendant didn’t let her order her drink first despite being the only lady in her row. I told her that expecting to go first because she’s a woman is sexist and the flight attendant was simply going from the leftmost seat to the rightmost seat.…

That is less than 20% of a cheese. How dare.

But you don’t understand, sometimes I’m treating my parents to a meal and the server hands the bill TO MY DAD. What, just because he is a man who is 30 years older than me you think he has more money than me? Well he does. But my mom makes more money than dad and she pays for things too! How dare they ASSUME.

I always combine my Whatever’s On Sale Cocoa with 3 cups of hot milk regardless of the directions.

I don’t like the gym uniform asthetic at all. Come on, if we’re going to be in Poke England, I want to dress up like a Victorian aristocrat. I mean, sure, have the option to look like you’re in a sports-ball game (complete with tacky logos), but also let me fight gym leaders in a poofy dress WITH A BUSTLE.

Joey, I thought about getting Twitter just so I could tell you how beautiful and moving that episode was. I’ve been listening to the show since the beginning and while I don’t know anyone involved personally, I think you chose the right people to have this discussion with. I haven’t personally struggled with tokenism…

Not her kids, though. They were taken away.

Industry fact:

Counterpoint: ALL produce is, technically speaking, organic.

I believe the implication is that website designers are bad, negligent people. Which, from my very limited experience, is true.

Yeah, he’s not racist, just sexist! Everybody be cool!

If the stripper had any semblance of political savvy, she knew that having Hunter’s kid would keep the money rolling in. Doesn’t make what she did right, but I understand (I understand the stripper, not Hunter. He damn sure should have used more protection. Dumbass).