The real headline here is "Angela Lansbury, Still Alive!"

Conceded.

Yet the limp sausage used to beat the English Beat remains unhoused to this day.

Leave Charlie out of this!

That's not sweat!

Our dossier indicates otherwise.

So that's who he means when he says, "It's ok to say that, I have a black friend…"

I can barely manage being one thing.

I am Spartacus.

Apropos to nothing, but when did humans stop being humans to become nothing but sweaty, senseless canvases for shitty tattoos?

That frog is Reddit tested, 4Chan approved.

I don't believe all the words in that headline are meant to go together…

The Future isn't what it used to be.

Forty stone, right 'nuff, guv'nah!*

He was soft on dissidents.

I disagree.
- A. Hathaway

Billy Crystal would've found a tasteful way to work it into the monologue.

"And I am the Walrus. Coo Coo Ka Choo."

What's that?

"Prez forces loaf of meat to eat meat of loaf!"