Welp, the first thing I thought when I saw this was:

How about a Fiat Twin Air?

Two less cylinders, and a Turbo!

Some say that it's wheels were hand forged by unmarried virgins.
And that if you press the horn, bhangra music plays.

Yep, its luxury - mechanical buttons.

None of that touchscreen crap.

Your not allowed to bring prostitutes back to your hotel.

Well, unless your willing to pay for the hotel staff to look the other way as well as pay the women in question.

And the problem is?

Sure, the Fiat Grande Punto in a hideous dress that is the 500 L is terrible. Most Fiat's aren't.

How the hell can you run a place that's larger than most countries while meeting only once every two years?

That's just insane.

Same here in the UK, but then it's rather poorly reviewed here.

The 200 is actually already sold as the Flavia.

But only in convertible form, never seen one on the road - or any of the Lancias rebranded as Chryslers.

Actually our current government is a shambles.

But then again even when their government is working the Americans NEVER pay their parking fines over here.

I'd go for neither to be honest.

I actually quite like the look of the Toyota Aristo, but the only time I've ever seen one on the road it was being used as a minicab.

"Q" for Questionable Logic/Behaviour?

Well that's... ..horrifying.

Though somebody should write it up as a Bond Villain's weapon: "Give me power over the world or I'll unleash my Flying Crowbar of Doom!"

Bonus points if the guy's name is Dr Freeman.

To be fair the Insignia isn't a luxury car here either.

Not because of the size, but because of the quality of materials. Vauxhalls/Opels have gotten a lot better than they used to be, but they're still just family cars.

Hire the guys who designed the Ubermachts in GTA V.

Android phablet user here, and there was a breif second while I wondered why I had a cursor.

Grand Theft Auto, not Gran Turismo.

Oh, I thought it was just obnoxious product placement.

Advertising has jaded me, damn it.

This pipe is so cracked it might actually be awesome.

To somebody with too much money.

Its.. ...facinating.

Though I do wish I had finished eating before I started watching these...