I am from the south, and my entire family is genetically inclined toward pottymouthism. One of my mother’s very favorite phrases has always been “showing your ass” — translation: “acting like an asshole.” She was quite fond of threatening immediate, irreparable violence unto us if we acted out in public. Case in…

I adore Love Actually!

Yes! For you kids who are unaware, back in the early days of phone modems, if someone was on the Internet and someone else in the house picked up the phone to make a call, they would hear the hissing of the modem in the phone. And then they’d go, Ohhhhh, shit, because the Internet connection would be broken, and the…

Starred for the mention of Zsa-Zsa.

My husband and I got married n the mid-90s. We had two of the colorful V-Tech translucent phones — one purple, one lime green. They were the shit. They matched our iMacs. :-)

She has been offered her job back. But this story threw me into a rage spiral just in time for Christmas.

Hugh Grant is vile. He’s one of those dudes who peaked at age 30 and keeps telling himself that 55 is the new 25. One day he’ll be 75 and all alone, because no one will know who the hell he is, and he’ll be all, Whhhyyyyyyyyyy won’t B-list models have the sex with meeeeeeee anyyyyyyymorrrrrrre? And he’ll be all angsty…

I feel bad for the women. But I really, really detest Steve Harvey. Even before he wrote those stupid books, I got major creeper vibes from him. He grosses me out. I can't stand to watch him.

The blue one in the photo? I had that exact same wallet but in brown. I graduated from college in 1990, and that thing was just perfect (giant enough) for holding my very first paycheck stubs. It probably would have lasted for decades, but I have a wallet/purse fetish and probably only used the wallet for a few…

Yes, because that’s totally what’s wrong with the world today: a severe shortage of navel-gazing. I keep thinking about what an earlier poster said: At last, a naked young white lady on the Internet.

See, it’s not really “leaked photos” when you take them yourself with your own damn phone, make a zine out of them yourself and then post them online yourself.*

I love you, Harbour Seal.

Yes! OMG, I said the same thing upthread. M&M was great at first, but since they made it mo’ wacky, her character is insufferable. The casting is great, but the writing suuuuuuuuucks.

WHY AM I IN THE GREYS??? I hate GREYS. I don’t even watch “Grey’s Anatomy,” I hate greys so much. Is that it? Is it because I’m not a citizen of Shondaland? Please ungrey me. Please? For the love of God. Or whoever your deity is.

I would watch Madame McCarthy read the phone book (can I still say that? Do people know what a “phone book” is anymore?) while she wears a Trump wig. That’s how much I like her.

Because they are lazy AF. Cute young woman at the breakfast table? Putting his children to bed? This confuses their tiny brains. It must only mean one thing — she is there to please him.

You are very kind to suggest that I deserve the book. But really I need to wait until I can help a nun cross the street or something.

This news is fabulous. I am SUCH a fan of the Cormoran Strike books. I *am* a fan of mysteries (right now I’m reading a Laura Lippman that is AMAZING). Here’s how much I like the CS books: The third one came out a couple weeks ago, but I refuse to buy it because I don’t feel like I deserve it yet. I have to do…

This is an entirely legit question. She had BETTER NOT start writing board books or something, or I will lose my shit.

Hahaha! I figure any boy over the age of about 3 months knows he has one! I think they discover the penis before they discover their hands, don’t they? (I only have a daughter, and I have walked in on her masturbating several times since she was about 3 ... she didn’t know it was “wrong” to hump the edge of the sofa…