"We Love the New Trump Kompromat, and Here's Why You Should, Too"

13 Reasons 13 Why

It actually all makes perfect sense once you realise that Eliza weighs the same as a duck.

Not just his arteries! His heart is Under Siege 2!

You've clearly never spent six hours in line waiting to buy panties in 1980s Communist Poland.

Fun fact: You better take care,
If I find you been creepin' 'round my back stairs.

Jeeesus Christ, these are, barring the Lightfoot, and I guess the Geldof, terrible.

What about Mark Wahlberg?

Yeesh, get with the times, gramps! Bic makes pens for HER now!

Schadenfreude is now America's number one export.

They're all just a bunch of regular schnooks.

Noel Gallagher is preparing an amicus curiae brief as we speak.

But can I borrow a feeling?

Why don't you have a spoon that just says "Earth"? It would save time.

Planet Thorax

I got a Community notification for this???

What a fun, sexy Timelord he would be.

When Joanne got that "chowder" answer, and Trebek said, "Yeees, we'll accept that", I was really hoping the next words out of his mouth would be "though the correct pronunciation is CHOWDAH!"

But Sean, The Cure is silly! It is silly to like The Cure!

"Doug Evans, the company’s founder, would compare himself with Steve Jobs in his pursuit of juicing perfection. He declared that his juice press wields four tons of force—“enough to lift two Teslas,” he said."