Triceratops Farting Wildly

These resemble the wooden nickels we’re not supposed to take.

For this to be perfectly historically ironic, we need a British group to swoop and steal the treasure from both of them.

my friends keep pressuring me to audition for it but i’m just so nervous i’ll accidentally slip up and admit that under my smooth, tanned skin and tight designer jeans i’m actually a smelly block of cheese

The Mercator maps we all used in school went off a model created by a German cartographer. He placed Europe dead center, drew most POC countries smaller than actual size, and put the northern hemisphere on top. If you watch The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore, you’ll notice he displays the Peters Projection map, a…

No sex occurred. It was in some kind of stable. There was Thor (Chris Hemsworth, but it was definitely Thor) with just his cape, boots, and both hammers.

I had a dream one time I was helping to hide Spike in a car. He was crouching down in front of me. I could feel his body against my legs. I had my hand on his head and his hair felt so soft.

My dream was with me getting shtupped senseless by Tom Hiddleston, and even though he was whispering this incredibly filthy things in my ear and doing things that I never even let my long-term ex do to me, he was always incredibly polite.

Alex Trebek. We were going to town, sweaty and frantic and he kept yelling, “Who is....your daddy?” over and over again like they phrase it on Jeopardy. Suddenly he pulled out and I was standing naked in front of the studio audience, crying.

Hold up... I thought Lucas got bought out. She killed him? I mean, I didn’t like the prequels either, but that seems harsh, Carrie.

... why is that person holding it?

but maybe then they can go live in a nice retirement home together

I’m pretty miffed about Rona fucking Ambrose and her lame attack. All they did was allocate some of their housekeeping funds to nannies instead of whatever Harper was doing with that share (polishing his Lego head?). It’s a non-story borne of desperation. And the NDP attacks and says he’s not spending enough? Buddy…

So last friday i went to a friend’s brother’s birthday party at a bar, i didn’t know anyone except the one guy. I was talking to him for about 15 seconds when this girl came up to say something to him, then looked at me and started losing it. She had cut my hair the day after Halloween and remembered who I am and…

way harsh, Tai.

Ugh, goddamn fuck all of these xenophobic assholes. And your “american made” “support local economies” bullshit is so transparent. It’s 100% about being racist and screwing over brown people. No matter that they are good, enterprising and hard-working people. People that embody the values that are what America is…

I always credit Jordan Catalano for spontaneously inducing puberty. My breasts grew three sizes the day I first saw him on MSCL. But Angel....Angel is the one who created in me my life long love of broody misunderstood men in leather jackets.

“Omg if I ever found out I made someone feel that unsafe I’d set up a restraining order against myself for them, proactively go to the police and offer any assistance they require, and sign up for therapy because clearly something is wrong SOMEWHERE. But then again I never raped anyone.....”

I imagine that could work…