I assume they only serve right wings?

Yeah, but a car giveaway is taxable income and bees are not. Quit giving the 1% tax breaks in your hypotheses.

I like Michelle Williams and all, but let’s get real for a moment. If she’d wanted equal pay, then she would’ve previously worn a prosthetic penis on film.

You’re right. My penis does have a lazy eye.

Yeah, you gotta drink it all down,

Well he has a background in education, he was used in a child rearing project as a stand in for a human infant at a local elementary school in middle America. He’s tough on all of the things anyone may think a candidate should be tough on and moderate on things people think he should be moderate on. His running mate…

Shrek, bitches!*

*I’ve not actually seen Shrek but I think there’s a 95% chance that’s a Shrek catchphrase.

People tarred and feathered their victims after quartering them? Well, I guess it does save on tar and feathers.

Turned into some meme reposting page....slowly disappearing from reality

Works on contingency? No, money down.

Excepting the all-too-brief stint when Wendy’s pitchman Wendy hosted in 2009.

Spoiler alert: In some of this fan fiction, he was a rough rider in more ways than one

Well yeah, they live inside of my head.

Just have your half-assed, can’t hold a tune band hit the lotto by getting your song in a hit film—and you’ll find a way to make change for a hundy while you rip a solo.

I haven’t tried playing the guitar and counting money at the same time, but I imagine it’s near-impossible.

I thought the Streisand Effect was to drive Elliott Gould crazy by repeatedly calling him “Mr. Streisand.”

So, Larry Wilmore’s the 21st Century Ted McGinley then?

I heard the “I ain’t afraid of no gays” in Ray Parker Jr’s voice in my head as I read that line.

STATES RIGHTS

EXCEPT THOSE ONES WE DON’T LIKE THOSE ONES

Technically I’m a Xennial, a smaller demographic between Gen X and Millennials. I own a TV and watch my laptop in bed!