That was his only option? Come on. The guy owns a hotel with a restaurant a few blocks away; surely they’re open and could use the money. Granted, Trump restaurants probably aren’t much better than fast food, but the optics would have been nicer. And goodness knows there are plenty of caterers in the DC area who would…

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, you’re a riot. You’re a troll, right? Surely nobody is this fucking stupid, right? Oh, wait, the 63 million people who voted for Trump are. He is the classic example of failing upward.

Okay, not a perfect metaphor as the bros who bought these tickets saw pretty quickly that they’d been conned and demanded restitution, but hasn’t Dump been sued a number of times as well?

For some reason I was thinking of the words of Emily Doe when she was speaking at Brock Turner’s sentencing hearing. She said that at first she thought if she hadn’t gone to the party, it wouldn’t have happened, but that’s not true. He would have done this to someone else. (And he probably has done it to a few someone…

You get two minutes for that now.I vaguely remember one bout shortly after that rule went into effect: The two combatants knocked off each other’s helmets before proceeding with the fisticuffs.

Because neither God nor the Devil want anything to do with them. Why do you think Strom Thurmond hit the century mark?

Clearly I’m not the only person who saw this as a metaphor of the Trump Administration. And the suckers who voted for Trump are probably the same sort of folks who would have fallen for Billy McFarland’s shtick if they had enough money for tickets to the clusterfuck that ended up being the Fyre Festival.

Destroying the country to own the libs. What a strategy.

Haven’t we all known that he has the emotional maturity of a spoiled toddler?

This may be the least offensive tweet Twitterfingers has ever produced.

Not that I’ll be watching the Stupor Bowl if i can help it, but hummus is always good with veggies. Salsa is great with tortilla chips. Problem fucking solved.

True.

THIS. And these days women have to work outside the home to pay the fucking bills.

Dammit, Janeane, not you. I thought you were better than this.

I’m also a Caps fan, and my only regret is that the skills competition the night before won’t be nearly as fun without him. And that he’ll have to sit a game (preferably that one-game roadie up to Toronto that’s the last game before the All-Star break). 

Ovi wants another Cup, and he’s going all out to get it. That’s probably one reason he’s skipping the All-Star Game this year; he’s limiting himself to one bender a year.

One chooses not to have sex before marriage. One chooses to follow a religion. One does not choose his/her sexual orientation. See the difference. I don’t care that he’s a virgin at 31, but do care that he’s a sanctimonious fuckwit.

Yeah, well, most of the people who voted for the sex-offender president were supposedly “moral” evangelicals who would vote for a serial killer if he had an R next to his name and promised to appoint anti-abortion Justices to the Supreme Court.

Is that more or less cringeworthy than Jeff Bezos’s tweets to his new paramour?

I can believe W. and even Darth Cheney did what they did in the mistaken belief it was good for the country. And as awful as he was, W. at least tried to be empathetic. He kind of sucked at it (“I wish I could wave a wand.”), but at least he tried.