Just in case you happen to have some nice fava beans and Chianti one day, you mean? I’M ON TO YOU.

“How do you get from a blind date to one less kidney?”

The liver is different. That sucker regenerates!

Turdface McDickpunch

Hmm... would I take on a speech impediment for improved abilities to give oral?

I loved that book, it really helped us. That tv shows sounds super annoying. Like....Eat Pray Love but with infinity scarves and uggs. Like... no. If I’m watching a show about clutter I am going balls deep and watching Hoarders.

Normally if I want ice cold air blasted my way I just ask my wife a question.

I feel like you’re saying a bunch of nothing

So we can finally find out what color the dress is?

“That’s no Death Star! Wait... “ <static>

Inverted recursive universe somehow rights itself.

“Here’s airtight proof you don’t exist.”

Military Dogma uses labs, cat scans

Built my robot duplicate; permanent vacation.

They came, we tried, they won

It rained for the last time.