Meanwhile, upstate in Tampa, the Bucs text about pus a lot.

Haha, correction - I enjoy mocking everything! Especially if there are people who take life way too seriously around.

Don't forget to jump to the conclusion that I'm fetishizing them due to them being black and Colombian.

I don't know, it looks like another oversexualized, autotuned pop music video.

Dear Shakira and Rhianna,

As a life long Terps fan, this picture has helped me get through many many rough seasons.

Not to get too deep into the darkest shit of racism, but I actually think it's also a fantastic extra gesture that they have a white woman sitting on his lap.

HA women!

Not tear gas.

Can we please curb the use of "Truther" as a description of these type of people and use the more accurate "Paranoid Schizophrenic"?

It's hard to imagine that, for something this important, a guy could just skate by with almost zero scrutiny. That a guy with none of the requisite qualifications could just slip through the screening process, past dozen of checks, and be allowed to wander - befuddledly - into the inner sanctum of power, interacting…

Yep. Things will be juuuust fine in Sochi.

Can we just make "snuck" a word already? "Selfie" was added to the dictionary last year! If we don't get "snuck" in 2014 I vow to investigate 9/11!

Our government can't even figure out how a budget works, and the President during 9/11 now spends his days painting his pets. Honestly, this country can't even keep The Bachelor results secret, these truthers are greatly overestimating our governments capabilities.

In hindsight it was probably a bad idea to put the Broncos defense in charge of security.

He looks like a nice enough guy...let 'em through.

My girlfriend used the same trick to sneak into my house permanently.