YEAH JEETS

A-Rod: {Opens Derek Jeter gift bag} This thing is full of shit!

Sigh. Well, unfortunately, my family is almost entirely composed of right-wing ultra-conservative religious denialists of pretty much anything that wasn't written explicitly in the Bible. Global warming is a hoax, as is evolution and anyone claiming social injustice. Anyone who doesn't think like them is too stupid to…

I thought the answer was going to be that I lost money on all of them.

I had to do a lot of scrolling to figure out if this was two dicks one mouth or two mouths one dick because apparently graphics in primary colors at the start of an article take too much deduction effort on my part.

Wait, what?

You may not be interested in local news filmed with drones, but drones filming local news are interested in you.

The Mammalian Diving Reflex is better known for its involvement in another sport, soccer.

It's always Kinja :p

I haven't been teased this bad since that stripper SWORE she would meet me after her shift...

My husband puts hot sauce on SO MANY things. I ask him, how do you taste anything? It all has to taste the same if you put that shit on it.

Srirracha is made by the angels to make my food better.

Patriots got jobbed out of A Tom Brady miracle.

Even better was the press conference by Belichick after the game. It looked like he was going to snap and kill everyone in the room. It was glorious.

This is a safe place. Just be you.

All the HEB and Central Market brand stuff in those fridges makes me deeply depressed. I MISS YOU, TEXAS GROCERY STORES!

Pictures of other peoples fridges are fun!

^My mother whenever she checks my fridge.
My veggies always end up rotten before I get to them.