The true question should have been — how do you make that many coconuts lovely and what exactly constitutes their loveliness?

Me and my childhood buddies rode a mattress down the street during a serious rain storm one time. Epicness.

*Splodes* indeed. I'm looking at today's Kotaku East articles, and I feel like my head is 'sploding all over the place.

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts.

Exactly. That's why I said it wasn't PVP. PVP Mass Effect 3 multiplayer wouldn't work to save itself. I refuse to call it Horde Mode — Gears of War, be damned, but that's what it is. I feel like that would be best as well — point based, but I think it would get old. Mass destruction and infinite powers probably would…

I'll keep it short this time — I'm going to agree with you on this one. Having God of War multiplayer would be like having Darksiders multiplayer, and that's just a terrible idea.

Good God I just read that. That's a damn travesty right there. My GOD what a travesty.

Here in central Georgia, cupcakes and bourbon is just a way of saying, "Well, hell, it's another Monday. Better get to it."

Honestly — what?

That dude also has the most badass last name to go with that most badass stache. I hope he's still doing his thing, to this day.

Actually, he just stared at them blankly without saying a word. He smiled and nodded in approval.

Good review. And I'm glad they went a little more serious with the storyline. I loved the first Prototype for its pure destructive, kill-everything-then-kill-it-again mentality, but the storyline was terribly campy. Just goes to show somebody, somewhere, still cares about a storyline, muddled or not.

To your credit, I understand that Snoop is serious when it comes to marijuana. But that picture up there? That picture right there is the most serious I've ever seen him be — that or the most sober. I can't tell.

Best title for anything, ever.

Quality work, sir. Quality work.

Hey, man, women continue to surprise me everyday. Some fall for guys like that. I don't get it! But it was her decision, dating the gazelle and all.

True. Let's hope, however, she didn't get stabbed. That's some heavy duty console wreckage, right there.

Ahhhhhhh — I see what you did there. I always imagined he said "Ah one, ah twooo, ah three. *crunch* Three."

I was one of those five. It was like a sick obsession. I wanted to stop, but I kept going anyway. Granted, no one's done a better tranquilizer gun. No one.

Just another reason why visiting Japan has been at the top of my list since I was 10.