The harshest DUI possible? You are right. That’s totally the worst thing that could have happened to you, or anyone else, as a result of you driving drunk. LULZ BRO

As a dedicated console gamer that has not played PC games since the C&C: Red Alert and original Starcraft days (no FPS on PC, ever), what is it exactly that makes the mouse and keyboard so much better? Is it just faster to move the cursor around and lock onto someone, more precise, or is there something else entirely…

It feels like America is finally starting to settle down, everyone has taken a deep breath, and everyone has gone back to insulting and yelling at women on the internet over good old fashioned topics like baseball.

Looks like Frank Jackson is shaping up to be the next “constantly scream-at-the-crowd, scowl like a villain in Taken, furiously-pound-my-chest-and-the-floor” Duke player that is just fun to hate. And Grayson Allen is like John Scheyer/JJ Redick/Greg Paulus 2.0 only a better player.

Nice to see Greg Oden landed on his feet somewhere.

Mad Max: Furry Road

If you have the rings Phil has, you can do whatever you want. Literally, anything. Can grab ‘em right in the posse.

Not when it comes to picking the Bears QB. In Chicago, football is an “air-it-out-cracy, baby!”

Of course Around the Horn’s ratings are dropping. In living rooms around the heartland I can hear “OH SO ESPN PUTS ON A SHOW WITH A BLACK GUY NAMED “BLACKIST-ONE BUT GOD FORBID THEY HAVE A WHITE GUY NAMED WHITEST-ONE INSTEAD OF THIS WOP REALI”

A bunch of clueless, sloppy Irishmen got us into this mess, and I’ll be damned if they can’t get us out, too.

See normally I would have just ignored this. Today I am going to bless you and bring you out of the grays. Feels good. Cathartic.

James Harden is an unbelievable OFFENSIVE player, but let’s not get carried away and bring MJ into this as an analogy for an all-around basketball player because Harden is an absolute liability on that end of the floor.

Do something nice for someone else for no reason. Be extra kind to strangers, even though you don’t feel like it. This helped me.

I second the potential Votto to Red Sox move. Even if they don’t think they can get five great years, they are going to want to make a splash after watching Epstein and Francona in an incredible World Series.

Is there a fanbase in the world that anyone who isn’t part of said fanbase is like “yeah, those are decent folks. Good people there.” I feel like I see multiple comments like this on every Cubs article, it’s like you are all part of some misanthrope hive-mind.

Somebody (and I don’t really want or think it will be the Cubs) will still pay an astronomical amount to get him.

I was trying to smash that Reply button to scream “LACKEY, LACKEY!” into the abyss.

Counterpoint: This show is nothing like regular ass sitcoms. And I will take “weird for weird’s sake” if it means I get to watch commercial parodies for Arizona Tea where the catchphrase for the product is “The price is on the can, doh?”

At least he takes a break from putting gross things in his mouth during games. What’s that you say? He chews a combination of bubble gum, chewing tobacco, and sunflower seeds for hours on end in the dugout?

In that trash can pic, I am pretty sure blue dress girl is getting a good glimpse of that guy’s Australian penal colony ifyaknowwhatimean