I think different women fantasize about different things. But for most women I know, when this topic has come up, the thought of something that big goes along the lines of, "Uh - ouch."

These guys did it earlier, and bigger. But seriously, if you can't get a stack of bitcoin for singing about your giant thing, what good is the Internet these days?

Just, no. I saw other parents doing this with their kids pacifiers when my own child was a toddler, and there wasn't a single solitary second when I looked at one of her many sucked on, squishy suckees and thought, "I think I'll put that in my own mouth." For so many reasons.

I love Russell Brand, but TC must have been rolling his eyes and thinking, "Give me strength, Xenu, and don't let me offer this guy any real advice."

Now I feel like I know too much, and can't un-know it.

Okay, let's assume you're right. What does that say about people like Meryl Streep? Jeff Bridges? You know, famous and successful actors who seem likable? Do they all have secret baby-boiling facilities in their basements?

No need to jump to conclusions. I just don't get the 'acting' part of the equation.

Boil and eat a baby for fun? But what does that have to do with acting?

Damn straight. Rocket science is SCIENCE. Oh - you just wanted to compliment Mrs. Brill - right - not spoiling for a science vs. plumbing kind of discussion.

Simultaneous epiphanies are often the best kinds.

I've got one. When I use it, I definitely feel that my circulation is improved. But I'm not sure it helps with the sitting vs. standing issue because, well, I'm still sitting. I don't know if the issue is simply increasing movement of any kind, or increasing upright movement.

Liam and Miley 'broke up over her hard partying'? Or, a 20-yr-old and a 23-yr-old got engaged way too young, started to grow up, and realized they don't actually have as much in common as they thought and they would probably like to see other people before making what is meant to be a long-term commitment. They made…

The idea: After a certain age, if you want to stay thin enough to have a nice ass, your face is too thin because of the lack of skin elasticity and subdermal fat. If you keep on enough weight for your face to look like you and not a dried up prune, your ass will be as wide as the Mississippi. So you have to choose.

Re: Chris Brown - Real men don't talk like this, sing like this, act like this, think like this.

For the love of god, fix the link. Want to know.

Just curious, what's the opposite of fish in this context? All ham sausage? Fowl (i.e. cock-a-doodle-do)?. Cucumber?

Yes, well, luckily my serious tanning days ended when I moved to Europe several decades ago, so Whew! Besides the age spots, am still waiting for the previous years of beach-bumming to really make themselves known, though.

What were we thinking?

Yeah, it's all fun and games until you get your first age spots. Or melanoma. And then you're all like, Damn! Why didn't I wear that sunscreen?

Did you tell him he looks like less of a geezer when he's not hitting on the young'uns?