Och, Glasgae!

Come out and take it, you dirty, yellow-bellied rat.

"I'll show you for spying on me, dad!"

[eyes pop out of head; tongue rolls along ground]

[spins round three times]

"Who? Who, who?"

Owls can't make fists. They don't have hands. You are silly.

[faints dead away]

K-Tel

They are LEGENDS!

Sport has a way of bringing joy.

It was Super Saturday in the 6 Nations Rugby this weekend, so Mrs periscopes and I spent the day in a pub, watching three rugby matches with about 20 friends. It was also a friend's birthday.

Today, Diageo owns both Guinness and Bushmills brands (so drinking Guinness and Jameson's is going "off-brand").
They don't care whether their customers are Catholic or Protestant, just that they drink (responsibly…).

What are you writing?

Yeah: science, bitch!

Microsoft already has that. Every f#cking download, the final second takes forever.

I used to dream about being able to fly when I was a kid. I used to have self-esteem issues, so I could only fly by hovering about six inches above the ground.

If you're sticking, you're probably going a bit too soon.

Blukake

Nope.