It would have cost a lot more, but he had to take the comments along with it.

If he doesn’t cremate Gawker’s corpse, but instead tries to revive it, it’s a sure thing that the result will be substantially dumber than the original thing.

This is a good take because slavs, particularly Croats, are well known for their racial and religious tolerance. I mean after all, they fought so many wars because they wanted to engage in a particular type of cleansing. I can’t think of the word for it but it rhymes with methnic. Also, Croatia continues to use their…

Gotta give him credit though, he destroyed his legacy in under 30 minutes.

And as with any day that involves Papa Johns, the following morning is always worse.

The pizza dominoes quickly started to fall:

Yeah his fucking bros just all decided to pay him back at once. That’s totally believable. 

Schnatter is the Papa John's Pizza of humans.

This is what happens when ESPN closes their comment section.  

We ask our players 20 days a year — game days — to restrict their statements.

Yes. That’s Ms. Pac Man.

Initial reports have PacMan avoiding the confrontation, grabbing something to eat, and then seeking out his attacker.

So Atlanta’s airport has a strip club now?

Nobody circles the (Paddy) wagons like the Buffalo Bills!

In every picture it looks like he’s wondering if the pizza rolls are ready. 

Worse. They’re going to make him play 16 games for the Bills.

He looks like James Hetfield shaved his head, got the mumps and never stopped drinking. 

See? This is why the Bills don’t bother winning the Super Bowl. Less jewelry to hand out. Less drama.

But like was she hot

If you cry when your team loses, then you run the risk of becoming a meme. These goddamn kids and their memes, they get you when you’re at your very weakest.