Finally some good basketball news coming out of Ohio.

I don’t have two commas in my bank account, but the balance still gives me reason to pause.

I haven’t seen a River burned so bad since Cleveland.

Silver must have a Crystal Ball, which sounds like something LaVar should be selling for $1000 a pop.

The Ballad of Ricky Van Winkle.

Cavs in 9!

I’ve seen better narrative development (and acting) in porn.

Yeah, for a minute there I thought he was going to announce his choice was Baylor.

I announced my selection for prom the same way.

Nobody cares about basketball though ever since Steph Curry ruined the game with the three-point shot.

Good! Vegas has been taking money from me for years.

Add this to the list of things he couldn’t figure out at the Super Bowl.

In related news, Tebow finally made contact with someone else’s genitals.

Curt Schilling just released a statement preemptively denying Sox fans ever yell the f-word.

Baseball in Canada? They’re takin’ our jobs too!

That’s cool.

That’s a load of carp.

Pet peeve time: I’m neither frightened nor jarred by the possibility that Trout is really good and getting better.

Sir, would you like that in the can?